Tuesday, March 21, 2017

This is For Your Own Good

Have you ever heard or said the following: "I think ending this relationship is what would be best for you."?

Or, any other variation of "I'm doing this for your own good."?

As humans, we like to believe we know what is best for another person. But the truth is, when we say that phrase - or any combination of it - 9 times out of 10 we're actually doing what we believe is best for ourselves. We project our own fears, insecurities, anger, etc onto someone we love.

We are actually ending a relationship because we don't care about them anymore, or we've found someone else, or we're scared that they are going to end the relationship in the future, that we'll drive the other person away.

Or, as a parent, we may use that phrase when we're spanking a child, but what we really mean is "I'm angry with you and need to get that anger out." It's a selfish desire to try to force a child to become what we want them to be.

Today's Lenten sacrifice:

Give up projecting your own feelings onto someone else under the guise of doing something for someone else.

There is absolutely nothing wrong with doing something for another person. There is nothing wrong with temporarily sacrificing something for another person (i.e. giving up a few hours of partying so you can be there to comfort a friend). But you cannot make the decision of what is best for another person. You walking out of someone's life is not truly doing what is best for them - unless they say it is best for them.

Even God does not do this. Yes, he guides us through his Word as to what is best for us. He truly does know what is best for us. But he doesn't leave us. He doesn't walk away. He doesn't cause us physical harm.

When you find yourself in a situation where you feel you should do something (because it's best for someone else)... stop. Pray. Examine your own heart. Why are you really considering this decision? Ask God for help in guiding you to the correct decision.

May the wisdom of the Spirit be with you always, guiding your heart in making decisions which are healthy and godly and loving.

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