Duct Tape the Kids - Mom Needs Church

Disclaimer: this post does not mean to ignore the Church needs of fathers; nor is it intended to insinuate that the issues addressed in this post don't apply to fathers as well. But, as I am not a father, nor will I ever be one, I can only write this from the perspective that I do know and understand. 

I'm a mother. And as a mother, I can say with fair certainty that we all get the same way from time to time - completely and utterly drained. I'm not just talking about being physically drained. I'm also talking about emotionally and mentally wiped. And yes - definitely even spiritually spent.

Some churches don't want a nursery during service time. They feel it is important that even very young children attend service. It doesn't matter if the mother can't pay attention to the service - it is her responsibility to make sure the child grows up in the church. She may attend service every Sunday, and not actually get a chance to hear the sermon, or sing more than two lines of a hymn, or even say the entire Lord's Prayer, until that child is 3 or 4 years old - but that's ok... as long as she has that child in attendance.

Moms Need Church!

This belief that the mother should be willing to sacrifice her worship time every week for 3 or 4 years (or more) is so wrong! MOMS NEED CHURCH! They need uninterrupted service and the ability to have their undivided attention on the Pastor, the message, the singing, the fellowship, the prayers. They need to refill their spiritual banks!

A spiritually dry mother does nothing to help raise a child strong in faith. A spiritually dry mother often finds herself dreading those Sunday services - an attitude the child will learn to recognize. A spiritually dry mother finds herself slipping further from God, and thus teaching her child less about God, and acting less in the way a Christian should try to behave. A spiritually dry mother trying to teach her children about Christ is simply not possible. It's like expecting a coma patient to do brain surgery on another patient.

Moms sacrifice a lot for their kids - their time, energy, money, and the list goes on. And yes, there is nothing wrong with a mother sacrificing her worship time sometimes to ensure her child grows up going to Church services. But mothers cannot and should not be expected to sacrifice her spirituality for this or it will all go wrong.

I cannot stress this enough - Mothers need a chance to reboot their spiritual energy. And they need a fairly regular opportunity for this. Here are several ways the Church community can help with this...

- Offer a (volunteer) staffed nursery at least once a month.
- Offer babysitting in the homes of mothers so they only have to worry about getting themselves to services.
- Never make a mother feel guilty or ashamed when she does have her young one in the nursery, or leaves the little one at home.

Let's all please help support the spiritual health of mothers in our Church!

Spiritually Dead or Spiritually Dry?

Yesterday, I made the comment to someone that I was spiritually dead. He corrected me, saying he didn't believe I was spiritually dead, but that rather, I was spiritually dry. What's the difference?

The main difference I see, is that spiritually dead means you're separated from God. And, you don't really care, or don't really notice. Spiritually dry is exactly that... a dry spell. A temporary drought where there is little to no passion for Christ.

"For you will be like an oak whose leaf fades away or as a garden that has no water." Isaiah 1:30 

I find it rather interesting that the signs of being spiritually dead or spiritually dry are quite similar:

1. We do things because we are supposed to, not because we want to. We give to others out of obligation rather than desire.

2. Sermons, scripture reading, hymns - they're all given, listened to, sung with a lack of passion for the words.

3. There's a lack of passion for Christ. Our faith is supposed to be contagious, but when there is no passion behind that faith, it is not contagious. People aren't motivated to move towards Christ because we have no motivation to show them the joy God brings us.

I'm probably missing a few signs here, but I think these 3 sum it up pretty well.

So, what causes us to become spiritually dead or dry? To a degree, I think some of what I am about to list can be causes of spiritual death or drought...

1. Depression
2. Worry
3. Anger
... These three block us from being able to see the grace of our Lord, and keep us from feeling the joy that grace can bring us. Depression makes us unable to see the joy; worry drains us emotionally, and eventually spiritually, making us weak; and anger makes our hearts hard, and keeps us from giving and receiving love from anyone - including God. Each of these can bring about a dry spell, which, if left untreated for long enough, can bring on spiritual death.

4. Sin
... Yes, we are all sinners. But some of us reside within sin so much, and are unaware or uncaring. It becomes so much of what we seek, that we become separated from God. One of the biggest sins (in my opinion) which can cause this separation is pride. We get so wrapped up in what we want and how we want it - in how we know it should be - that we lose sight of God and His will.

I saw one really good article on how to know if you're spiritually dead, and it talked about the Church - how those who are spiritually dead don't care if their church also dies. They'd rather fire a pastor who was bringing about change and growth, than allow themselves and the church to continue growing. They'd rather see the church die. This is the type of pride I am talking about. (5 Signs You're Spiritually Dead)

How do we move forward if we find ourselves in a dry spell?

"So let us know, let us press on to know the Lord.  His going forth is as certain as the dawn; And He will come to us, like the rain, like the spring rain watering the earth."  Hosea 6:3

1. Give your worries to God. Place them at his feet.
2. Repent
3. Let go of anger. Forgive whomever you're angry with.
4. Pray

I realize these are all so simple - too simple. And they aren't as easy as they sound. But we must "press on to know the Lord."