Seeing What We Want to See

In the past few days, I've had a few items come across my Facebook feed that struck a chord in me.

The first was a video which spoke about how some people get bent out of shape about how we look when we show up to Church on Sunday morning.

The second was a story posted on a funeral home site of a young lady who passed away much too early from a heroin overdose. 

These two items made me realize just how much emphasis we put on what we see, rather than what is important. It made me realize how we see only what we want to see, rather than the truth.

Which is more important - that someone comes to Church, wants to worship God, wants to embrace and be embraced by the Body of Christ? Or that this person comes shows up in ripped jeans and a dirty tshirt?

Which is the important truth - that a young woman is just a worthless drugged out single mother? Or that this young woman had so much pain and confusion inside her and just needed to be embraced by someone willing to be God's hands?

This habit of not seeing the important and real truth is something many of us are guilty of. When we have a friend who isn't there for us every day like we believe they should be, we get angry and feel this person no longer cares. We refuse to even try to see the truth. Perhaps this person is just simply busy. Perhaps this person has so much stress and pressure on them that they are unable to meet our needs as well. Perhaps this person has slipped into such a deep depression that they're so exhausted trying to keep themselves afloat they just don't have the energy to keep anyone else afloat as well.

We are blind to the truth. It's not even blindness - it's a refusal to even bother to look. We get so self absorbed in our own needs, our own beliefs, or own desires, that we don't look further. We see people's actions, but not the motivations for those actions. We see their appearance, but not the conditions they face that lead to that appearance. We put what is on the outside above and beyond what is on the inside.

We measure a person's worth by what we see with our eyes. And when this "worth" doesn't measure up - we fail to be God's hands for this person.

Stop looking at someone with your human eyes, and instead look at them with godly eyes - with eyes of compassion and love and insight. Get to know people. Learn their story. Love them because of their story - not in spite of it. Reach out to one another regardless of how someone looks, or acts, or lives. Love one another regardless of these things.

Love as Christ loves.

Black Lace Panties to Church?!?

Well... at least they aren't white since it's before Easter....

A little over a week ago, for World Day of Prayer, I wore a brightly colored turquoise dress with open toe pink sandals. I thought nothing of it. I was told to wear something bright... and quite frankly, black dress heels just did not match the cheery dress. A comment was made about it being too early to wear such a thing. I simply assumed the person meant because there was 3 feet of snow on the ground.

A couple days later, at church, this same person made a comment to my daughter about her open-toe dress shoes (not even sandals... they were dress shoes with a little tiny hole at the toes) and how it's too early for those. Again, I assumed she meant because of the weather. The next day, this woman told me how she's impressed that my children do what they want - that they don't follow social norms.

That confused the heck out of me. What do you mean don't follow social norms?!

Granted, she is right - my kids are taught from early on to be themselves. I do reign them in a little to prevent them from being complete social outcasts and/or ending up in prison... but I encourage them to do their own thing. But I really had no clue what this woman was talking about. And then I remembered my step-mother telling me you can't wear white shoes before Easter (and after Labor Day). So, I looked that up - and sure enough, you also aren't supposed to wear open toed shoes or white pants/skirts during this time-frame either.

Well, I am quite certain God doesn't care what I wear to church - or what my children wear to church. I am quite certain if Jesus had a pair of white sandals, he'd be wearing them before Easter - at least, until he needed to give them to someone in need.

Who are we to judge what others wear?

And, I am just as guilty. The other day I was talking to someone about how this group of teenagers had all gone to church in jeans... which isn't really a bad thing... but that one of them had even gone so far as wearing sweatpants. I was brought up being taught that you dress as nicely as you are able to afford for church as a sign of respect to God. If all your family can afford is jeans... then wear jeans. If sweats are all you have, so be it. But when you have money and your parents are buying you all name brand things - you can afford to show a little respect to the Lord - the one who has given your parents the gift of being able to afford nice things.

Now, I do still hold to this belief. While true, it is not my place to judge others (and I will have to do better on reigning in my tendency to do this), I do believe you should dress as nicely as you are able as a sign of respect. Again, this may indeed mean sweat pants, or stained and ripped jeans. But if you have the money to afford $200 pairs of jeans, you should try to show a little respect and gratitude towards God that you can afford those.

That said, I don't think we need to hold to "social norms" when it comes to what to wear. There was a time when women weren't supposed to be seen in jeans/slacks. Well, the time has come when it shouldn't matter if women are seen in white shoes in February.

God really doesn't care what we wear to worship - he only cares that we show up... and if that's in open toed shoes, white slacks, and black lace panties, then so be it.